The Love of Science
by Anne Packrat
Summary: All three of the Elric brothers inherited their father's love of science. But Al and Heiderich think their older brother Edward may love it just a bit too much... College AU. April Fool's Day Challenge Fic.


Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist is created by Hiromu Arakawa and is distributed by Viz, Funimation and Square-Enix. No profit is made from this story.

Note: This qualifies as a College AU.

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The Love of Science

A Fullmetal Alchemist Oneshot

by Anne Packrat

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The familiar scream of Ed Elric broke the peace and quiet of the Elric household. "ALPHONSE HEINRICH ELRIC!"

Al sighed and looked up from his book to meet the eyes of his identical twin, the unfortunately-named Heiderich Alphonso Elric, more commonly known as Hei. Hei gave Al a noncommittal shrug and turned back to his own studying.

Sighing again, Al closed his book and put it on the couch beside him. Experience had taught him that Ed would spend at least five minutes raging through the house before he finally found the twins.

While waiting for the inevitable attack of an angry Edward, Al took a moment to study his twin. They were identical, yes, but no one really would have any trouble telling them apart. Al followed the tradition of the other males in the family and kept his hair long and gathered up in a ponytail. Hei's hair was cropped close to his head and kept quite short. He justified this by saying that long hair was a hazard in the profession he was studying, being prone to be caught in-between gears, turbines or other parts of various machines.

That wasn't the only difference between them. Al was almost compulsively clean and neat about his room and appearance. As with his twin brother that was also due to his chosen field of study. Cleanliness was a must when dealing with anything having to do with biology. Hei as an engineering student was more likely to be sporting dirty fingernails and a grease stain or two.

Then there was their names... People always gave them odd looks upon learning the boys' full names. Not for the first time did Al regret the fact that their father had been allowed free rein in naming the twins. Their father, Hoenheim, was a very intelligent but eccentric man, and he was not particularly original when it came to deciding what to call things like inventions or his children. Thus the man had found no problem with naming one boy and then taking the same name, reversing it, changing a few letters, slapping it on the twin and calling it a day.

"AL!" yelled Ed again, shaking the boy out of his reverie. Ed's voice was much closer then it was before, probably just down the hallway. Al mentally counted down. _"Five, four, three..."_ Ed Elric appeared in the doorway, his face set in a scowl and his eyes flashing. _"Huh,"_ Al thought, _"Brother's early this time."_

Ed scanned the living room until his eyes alighted on the brother he sought. "You!" he cried after spotting his prey. A few furious strides brought Ed to Al's side. Several sheets of paper were thrust under the boy's nose. "Look at this! Do you know what these are?"

"They're papers, brother," Al said nervously, leaning back in a futile attempt to escape his brother's wrath.

"Yeah," Ed replied, shoving the paper's even further into Al's chin, "Do you see what's on these papers?"

Al's eyes crossed as he tried to focus on the content of the papers. "Uh, you mean proofs for your latest experiment?"

"No!" Ed growled, he stabbed the paper with a finger, "Look here." Finally Al saw what Ed was talking about. A few short black hairs were clinging to the bottom of the page. Ed turned slightly and pointed an accusing finger at the sleek black cat currently napping in a sunbeam. "That mangy flea-bag of yours was in my work area!"

Al sighed and rubbed his temples. So that's what this was about. It was the cat again, of course. His father and Hei had readily accepted the stray Al had found and dubbed Roy, but for whatever reason, Ed hated the animal, constantly accusing it of everything from stealing his dinner to looking at him in a funny way. "Did Roy break anything?"

"Well, no," Ed said, deflating a little. "But he still shouldn't have been in there!"

Taking the papers from his brother and carefully wiping off the cat hair, "I told you, brother, if you keep your door closed then Roy can't get in there."

"I had it closed!" Ed protested, roughly grabbing the papers back, "That little bastard used some kind of feline trickery to get in!"

"You know, Ed," Hei said, looking up from his book, "I passed by your lab yesterday and you'd left the door wide open while you were using the bathroom. In fact, I've seen you do that quite often."

Ed flushed white as he stared at Hei. "Okay, maybe a few times I left it open. But only a few!" The twins gave each other knowing looks, while Ed looked back and forth between them, in angry dismay. "You're missing the big picture here!" he said, again pointing a trembling finger at the dozing feline, "That animal purposely and maliciously violated the sanctity of my laboratory!"

Al rolled his eyes. "Brother, it's a cat. It's not out to get you. In fact, I doubt Roy thinks of anything beyond his next meal and wooing the female cat down the street."

Scowling Ed shook his head, "I'm telling you that damn bastard is out to destroy my good name and ruin my work!"

The twins were skeptical. "You know, Ed, if you had a girlfriend then maybe you wouldn't have time to build outrageous theories around the presence of a little cat hair," Hei said, the corners of his mouth curling up in amusement.

Ed blushed at the mention of the word "girlfriend," a reaction Hei had been counting on. "I- Who said anything about a girlfriend?"

"You are spending a great deal of time alone in the lab, brother," Al said, adding his voice to the fray, "Frankly, we've all been a little worried."

"Uh..." Ed stammered his blush deepening, "Well, I, uh..."

"Really, Ed," Hei said, ready to deliver the coup de grace, "You need to get out of the house, mingle, meet people, and work off all this restless energy you have. Maybe then you can finally get laid."

His face crimson, Ed stared at both his brothers in shock. "I- I do not need to get laid! I'm perfectly content with my life!"

Hei nodded. "Sure you are, Ed. That's why you think the cat has some sort of personal vendetta against you."

"I am perfectly fine!" Ed yelled. He turned to face Al. "Just keep that feline bastard out of my laboratory and I won't have anymore problems!" Clenching his fists, Ed whirled around and stormed out of the room, slamming the door on his way out.

Both boys watched their brother leave, their faces mirrored each other with dual looks that were equal parts concern and amusement.

"Poor, brother," Al said, after the echoes of his Ed's departure faded, "His first love is always going to be science..."

Hei smiled wryly, "But man cannot live by science alone. Maybe one day soon, Ed will realize that."

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Author's Indulgence

This was written for the fma7sins April Fool's challenge. The prompt I chose was mikkeneko's: "Al and Heiderich, identical twins, and a love of science." This is my first time writing Heiderich. I hope I didn't screw him up too badly.

Thanks to the creators, cast and crew of Fullmetal Alchemist.  
Thanks to my husband, Ryan, even though he's zonked at the moment.  
Thanks to those who leave comments or feedback. I greatly appreciate it.

And thanks to you for reading.

-- (Anne Packrat April 1, 2008)


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